by Jonathan C. Noble, Esq.                                                          3 minute read

The “amicable” mindset in family law

Dozens of people contact my office on any given month, wanting me to represent them in their family law matter. A modest percentage of potential clients come in with an “amicable” mindset towards the other side. This is true whether the legal issue is divorce, child custody, support, equitable distribution of marital assets, having a prenup drafted, or any other family law related matter. The people who find themselves thrust into a family law matter can often help themselves by taking an “amicable” approach wherever possible.

Amicable does not mean “pushover”

Being amicable does not mean you are a pushover. It does not mean you are submissive. Or that you give up, just to get through the (sometimes grueling) family law process. Amicable in the context of a family law case can often mean being open-minded and good-natured, yet firm. Amicable can mean trying to be fair where the family law related process can sometimes seem unfair. Staying focused on important matters and being “big-picture smart” are good partners to the amicable mindset.

“Hey, I want that ice cream scoop”

Whenever I hear a divorce client fight over an ice cream scoop, an avocado peeler, or a pet stained bathroom throw rug (all real-life examples), I know it is time for what I call a “client recalibration exercise”. Some people are born to fight. About anything. Others pick their battles wisely. Sometimes my job entails keeping a divorce client focused on the right things.

I welcome your comments. Please feel free to contact my office for a brief consultation or for an in-depth conference if you are involved in a family law matter. I look forward to hearing from you.