Forget the prospective in-laws, do your pets get along?

by Jonathan C. Noble, Esq.            3 minute read

The engagement ring quagmire meets canine incompatibility

One fascinating aspect of my job as a family law attorney is that each day brings the possibility of a new, difficult, or esoteric family law problem that needs a solution. One fairly common question I get from prospective clients is “who keeps the engagement ring when the wedding is called off and the engagement is broken?”

In a majority of states, including Pennsylvania, the law is clear. The engagement ring is a conditional gift. The ring is part of a contract to marry. If the engagement is broken, the ring should be given back to the giver. Even if the giver broke off the engagement. (A minority of other states take a different approach).

When Max and Daisy cannot get along at all

Not long ago, a young woman contacted me about keeping the engagement ring she had been wearing for the past year. She told me that the ring was given to her by her (then) boyfriend when he proposed to her. Their relationship seemed to be trending toward marriage until it became clear that his Mastiff (Max) and her German Shepard (Daisy) could not be in the same house together. The ongoing barking and fighting between the dogs was unbearable.

Neither person would give up their beloved dog. This prevented the couple from moving in together. After a while, things began to go south and they broke off the engagement. Based on the facts of this case and under Pennsylvania law, the boyfriend was entitled to have the engagement ring returned to him. The young woman was not happy about her need to return the engagement ring, but she did return the ring.

Try to be sure your pets get along before planning a wedding. Ideally, your children should be compatible too.

 

Couples end engagements for a multitude of reasons. Sometimes one party cannot stand their prospective in-laws. Sometimes they come to discover that one party is obsessively neat, and the other party is a complete slob (I call this the “Odd Couple Situation”). Sometimes an adult or minor child of one party will not accept the other party. This was the first time I had encountered a couple breaking up due to their pets not getting along. Although I have seen breakups occur due to one party having too many pets. I have also seen a breakup occur when a party is allergic to the other party’s cat or dog.

Pets are often treated as a member of the family

Sometimes finding and selecting a partner can be difficult. Pets can play an important role in a prospective partner’s life. Keep in mind that the pet may have existed in your prospective partner’s life before he or she met you. That bond is not easily broken, nor should it be. Hopefully, you are testing your pet compatibility with your partner long before the talk of getting engaged or moving in together takes place.

Please feel free to contact my office at 610 256 4843. I invite your family law related inquiry.

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Family pets and divorce in Pennsylvania – dogs are property in the eyes of the law, they are not treated as children

by Jonathan C. Noble, Esq.

Based on Pennsylvania equitable distribution law, if you come to the marriage with a pet, it will be your property if the marriage ends in divorce. 

Golden Retriever at the Museum
“A Golden Retriever at the Museum” appears courtesy of the artist Tom Mosser. Facebook Page: “A Golden Retriever at the Museum”.

In Pennsylvania, with limited exception, any property acquired during the marriage is martial property, subject to equitable distribution. This may include, but is not limited to money, real estate, retirement savings, furniture, artwork, dogs, cats, and other pets. In Pennsylvania, your family pet is treated as property, subject to equitable distribution, just like a piece of art, a piece of furniture, or a bank account. When a person owns a pet prior to getting married, the pet is normally considered pre-marital property. That means the person is entitled to keep the pet as their separate property upon separation or divorce.

In Pennsylvania, there will not be an enforceable “custody schedule” for your family pet. 

Dogs, cats and other pets are not subject to a custody schedule under Pennsylvania law.  Even though most people love their pets as if the pet was a child, the courts in PA do not treat pets as children. Any agreement regarding a custody schedule of a family pet upon divorce will not likely be enforceable in court. Of course, if the parties remain on good terms, they can informally decide whatever arrangement suits the dog and themselves.

Like everything else in a property settlement agreement, it never hurts to “think outside the box” where a family pet is concerned.

Just like a piece of furniture, an automobile, or any other piece of marital property, it is certainly possible to negotiate who will get the universally loved family dog. For example, if the other party wants an item that you may not particularly care about, perhaps a deal can be worked out whereby you would take the dog, but relinquish rights to the item coveted by the other party. “Pet visitation” is usually not a good idea in the context of a divorce, since it can prolong the ability of some people to move on with their life. It can also be another source of potential conflict.

Children, shared physical custody, and family pets. Something to think about. 

Many divorcing parties have a shared physical custody arrangement for their children. Sometimes family pets, (especially dog breeds that are historically good with children) travel back and forth with young children who spend time with both parents in two separate households.  Some label the dog a “transitional object”, which provides a sense comfort and security to children who now must spend time in two households through no fault or choice of their own. If the parties can agree to such an arrangement, and the children want to be with their family pet in both households, it is usually a positive experience in an otherwise negative situation for the children. Of course, the dog must have the right disposition to travel between households without problems.

Laws vary widely from state-to-state. Consult an attorney licensed in your jurisdiction for legal advice on the subject.  

In cases where the parties cannot agree on what happens to a pet, the courts are left to decide. Some states do recognize certain factors regarding where family pets should reside when parties separate and divorce. Courts may inquire as to who  primarily cares for the pet. This may include who usually feeds the dog,  takes it to the vet, walks the dog, etc. In rare cases, the court can order the pet sold, with the proceeds split between the divorcing couple.

The more issues resolved by the parties, without court intervention, the better. Normally, nobody knows your pet (or children) better than you do.

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